If you are looking for an online support group or feel like you need someone to talk to, feel free to email us here at Healing Grace or ask to join our online support group, the link is here.
Do you know someone who could use some cheering up or some support? Maybe you’ve had someone on your mind and you just haven’t taken the time to stop and check on them yet? Reach out to a friend, we all need support from time to time.
If you are looking for an online support group or feel like you need someone to talk to, feel free to email us here at Healing Grace or ask to join our online support group, the link is here.
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Losing a child is hard, just plain hard. After you've carried your child, delivered them and then gone through the awful tasks of saying goodbye, how can you honor your child? How do you keep their memory alive? There are so many things we can do to show our love for special loved ones. A few ideas might include:
Do you have a special way to memorialize a lost loved one? We'd love to hear your thoughts and suggestions!
This week, I'm sharing the story of a wonderful family and their long journey to starting a family. Sandra first became a mother, much like myself, back in 2009. She has graciously shared her story with us to share with you all. Know that you are not alone in your journey through child loss. There are parents who get it, parents who have been where you are and know how you feel. Here is Sandra's story... This is my story! In 2009 we decided to start our journey to a baby. This is our pregnancies and miscarriages from 2009 to 2016. 1. Our first miscarriage. Week 6. I saw the little embryo sac... Empty. 2. The second one happened six months later, in week 5. I remember the pain I felt from the contractions. 3. In the third pregnancy we really began to hope and felt happy about it. We did a scan in week 7 but what we didn’t know was that it died a few days later. The sad thing was that I had no idea and I got to week 15 before the bleedings started. I had a D&C a few days later. 4. This pregnancy was filled with anxiety but it ended well and Ebba is now filling our days with love. I got an epileptic seizure during labour but it went well. We have only a 10% chance to get a healthy baby in each pregnancy due to my genetic balanced translocation. So Ebba is a true miracle. 5. When we decided to try for another baby we had our 4th miscarriage in week 10 and I had to go through another D&C. At this point they also discovered a cyst (4 cm) and I’m thankful it disappeared. 6. Another pregnancy, miscarriage in week 4/5. 7. Our 6th miscarriage was the one where we actually thought we had a healthy pregnancy. It was a boy and he died in week 13/14 but was discovered in week 17. I had to deliver him at the hospital. He had severe deformities. 8. At this point we said no to another natural pregnancy and we asked for help. It was time for IVF with PGD. Cycle 1: 10 nice looking embryos at day 5, but all suddenly died. I was devastated and had nothing to transfer. 9. IVF with PGD cycle number 2: 9 good looking embryos, 5 could be sent for genetic screening and 1 came back normal. This little fellow named ”Dot” is now 6 months old and she kept her name Dot as a middle name. Her first name is Clara. It has been a long journey filled with emotions. I’m so happy to be where we are right now. So thankful ️ I'm turning 35 this year and live in Sweden with my husband Andreas, two daughters and two cats. I’m now live at YouTube with miscarriage support. With my six miscarriages and two IVF with PGD cycles we’ve been through alot. I want to support and help other girls out there with all my experience and love. Please subscribe and let us make this the best video channel of miscarriages and infertility. I’m doing this because I felt like there was no support for me when I had a hard time, I just don’t want others to feel the same way. Please subscribe, like and share.
The morning of November 12, 2013 is one that I used to tried to block a thousand times from my mind. Little did I know that on that day my heart would be both broken yet my lost soul would become free. I would begin to walk out of the darkness that kept me separated from God and others for thirteen years. I would finally walk into the light. It was very early and I felt my son greet me with a “Good Morning” kick. I was 26 weeks pregnant. Little did I know that would be the last kick I felt from him. It was the last time I spoke to him on this earth as I cradled him in my womb, safe from harm. Later that morning I felt a gush and thought my water was broken. My doctor urged me to come in right away. She checked the fluid levels and all looked good. Then I saw her face fall still. She moved the wand repeatedly over my belly. She paused and her eyes closed as she took a really big breath. That was the moment my life changed forever… My son, Joseph Michael Gibson was born into heaven, to be with Our Lord. Joey died. Died. I could not let those words cross my lips as searing pain tore my heart open. I shouted out to God, “Why?” But there was no answer… What I realized was that I stopped having answers at the tender age of sixteen when I was raped and my innocence was taken from me against my will. This trauma shut my soul down and I felt ashamed. There were times I could hardly breathe when I thought of that dark moment. In college, panic attacks began to rule my life. My soul begged for me to pay attention to the pain and anger, but I didn’t. I turned off God’s voice in my spirit; the light inside me was dim. I stopped feeling anything. I carried on going to school, working, interning, growing independent and exploring the wonderful city of Boston. How was God going to shine his almighty light back into my closed up heart? I did not trust any man nor did I want a relationship. I was on a path leading nowhere as far as dating was concerned until May 5, 2005 when I met my husband Jason. To my surprise, we hit it off right away. We were inseparable and the love, oh the love! It was powerful and so right. Jason helped me to open my heart to human love and I began to awaken a little. Then one day we stared unbelievably at a positive pregnancy test. We were excited and nine months later, the powerful soul of my first child, Lillian, was born. She was sent by God and my heart open more at a new kind of love. Maternal love. Birthing Lillian grounded me as solidly as the earth grounds the plants. This tiny infant helped me to pause, to breathe, and to calm my restless mind and heart. Jason’s love and motherly love gave me hope…enough to see more clearly what I was missing and my healing began. Yet, I was still unable to forgive the person who assaulted me. The memories continued to haunt me. Nine years later, my son’s death broke my heart and ironically, made me feel most alive. Losing a child is like losing a part of yourself. They are living extension of who you are. The birth of a baby draws out a fierce and mighty love inside the mother that ignites the most ancient parts of our soul, enabling us to discover a part of us we haven’t seen yet. Joseph’s short life span had a purpose. Here is what I have learned that has changed me: • The spirit of a child chooses to be born through you for a reason. Your children’s souls are divinely chosen for you to bring your own spirit to a powerful level of growth and healing. • Pain separates us from God which is the true meaning of sin. • Death and grief from loss breaks your heart open and holds the potential to bring you closer to God. • It is only when we are empty, that we can truly receive love. • When our heart breaks open, forgiveness and healing begins. Joey’s purpose was to break my heart open to God’s unconditional love and forgiveness. My first child, Lillian, was sent from God to ground me and years later she helped me through Joey’s death along with their father. Lilly filled my empty arms with her presence and held my hand and her sweet ways and humor made me smile through my tears. My sweet daughter helped to bridge the gap as Spirit drew me into God’s arms. I had been so angry at God, life and myself. What I had yet to discover was that anger separated me from love of myself and God. My heart broke open the day his spirit left my womb. Healing is not easy. At first I felt numb, almost like the darkness created a hole in my heart. I was empty. For months I was silent, ignoring the divine signs from above feverishly showing me everything was going to be okay again and to trust. Finally, through a dream, God showed me that my third baby was on the way. I saw my daughter Layla, who was waiting to be born and I felt God’s love. I knew I could trust God with all my anger. When I awakened, I let go of the darkness and allowed my heart to feel the pain and anger toward the man who raped me. I allowed myself to FEEL all of it as I sobbed uncontrollably. Every tear shed my shame and anger and replaced it with God’s love and forgiveness. I was no longer separated, but embraced by immense love. I knew then that I had to forgive this man too. This was the beginning of recovery from the losses in my life and toward spiritual growth. Love truly heals all things. I can now say that, He taught me a new kind of love. My son. My angel above. On March 25, 2015, Layla Donna Gibson was born – my little warrior. My incredible rainbow miracle. God’s miracle! Peace and Love, Lindsay Gibson Owner, Healthy Mom Happy Baby LLC www.healthymomhappybaby.com About the Author: Lindsay Gibson holds a Bachelor of Arts in Psychology and is a Pre and Post Natal Health and Spiritual Coach trained through The International Maternity & Parenting Institute in California. She now mentors for this Institute specifically for Grief, Loss and Spirituality. She has been trained specifically in health coaching for women before, during and after pregnancy by educating and supporting them to build a strong foundation mind, body and spirit. She is also a trained Holistic Newborn Care Specialist and Birth Doula. She, along with her Mother, Donna Cassity, MDiv., own what is now Healthy Mom Happy Baby LLC, supporting women from preconception through postpartum. Visit them at www.healthymomhappybaby.com
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Author:Just a girl, a wife, angel mother and friend... An infant loss parent, post menopausal 20 something year old and brain surgery survivor...I've been through alot and have a lot to share! Popular Posts
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